“Just make sure she’s on her best behaviour”

Famous last words.

“Whatever happens, just make sure she’s on her best behaviour and doesn’t bother any of my guests!”

T – 15 minutes: The house is suspiciously quiet, where is the puppy…

T – 10 minutes: Go outside and call the puppy

T – 5 minutes: Set some chairs up outside. Puppy comes running back looking very guilty. There is a funny smell in the air. Maybe the farmer is muck spreading? Maybe there’s something on the chair? Maybe I inadvertently stepped in a dog poo.

No. The puppy is covered nose to paw in something sticky and brown, whilst emitting some kind of odour that normally needs fumigating. She had managed to find some poo, and roll all in it.


A cold hose shower, puppy shampoo and a very sulky puppy resembling a gremlin later…

30 guests turn up for my Parents’ party…

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